Most people who know me will tell you that I am pretty quick to help out others wherever and whenever possible. I am definitely the person who will bend over backwards for everyone else even though I know the efforts are rarely reciprocated. Usually I have no problem with this. After all, we should be the type of person we want to see in the world and wouldn’t life be just a little bit better if we all were happy to help those around us? However, I must admit that lately four little words I normally don’t think twice about have me dreading this upcoming weekend.
“I need a favour”. Words that I have heard from people so many times they no longer pose it as a question, but simply state what they want, assuming that I will say yes. But what happens when you find yourself wanting to say no instead? This is something I have been internally debating for the better part of a week now.
Over the past few years I have come across people who have a tendency to ask for a lot. I have always stepped up and gone out of my way for them even though more often than not it means I am at some sort of disadvantage. To top it off, any time plans were made that did not directly benefit them, those plans were canceled or they pulled a no show and I am at a loss, for either time, money, or quite frankly…respect. I suppose, I am just approaching my limit. I have been questioning whether or not saying no makes you a bad person, doesn’t stepping down from a favour mean you are selfish? Should we not want to help others when we are able to?
This week is a tough week, but who am I kidding, they are all tough lately aren’t they? With Covid numbers spiking I am faced with the reality that I don’t know when I will be able to see the people I love next, and that is taking its toll on me. I have also managed to some how mess up my foot while standing still…how is that even possible you ask? I have no idea (Refer to “Potato week”) …These things just happen. Now, it is difficult to stand for extended periods of time and walking is do-able but a pain to be sure. All of this makes the favour infinitely more difficult to pull off considering it would require being on my feet for hours on end (a fact that the person was not terribly sympathetic too).
The point is, that sometimes the favour we need to do is the one for ourselves. Sometimes it is necessary to take a breath and take care of us, even if that means having to say no to someone else. Helping others is awesome, but sometimes, respecting your own time and limitations is necessary, especially when others don’t.